seinfeld turkey and wine

The Merv Griffin Show

• George runs over a flock of pigeons. Jerry’s girlfriend has a collection of old toys that she won’t let him touch. A new co-worker is freaking Elaine out. Kramer puts together the set of “The Merv Griffin Show” again in his apartment.
• Kramer takes the old Merv Griffin show’s set out of a dumpster and sets it up in his apartment, where he talks to anyone who comes by. After George hits a pigeon with his car, his new girlfriend is mean to him. She makes him take a squirrel to the vet and then take care of it at home if he hits one. A new guy at the office is driving Elaine crazy. Jerry has a new girlfriend whose late father left her a great collection of old toys. She won’t let Jerry even touch them, let alone play with them, but he quickly figures out a way to get around that. —garykmcd.
• Kramer finds the old set for the Merv Griffin Show in a dumpster and immediately sets it up in his apartment. He then starts to live his life like an interview show. The new guy at Elaine’s office keeps flirting with her without her noticing, which makes her mad. Jerry’s girlfriend has a great collection of toys but won’t let him play with them. George’s girlfriend makes him take care of a squirrel he runs over. —two_green_bottles.

• In the street, Kramer finds the set of the old Merv Griffin Show in a big dumpster for contractors. Miranda, George’s girlfriend (Arabella Field), is mad when he hits some pigeons with his car. George thinks that pigeons and people have a deal where people will ignore pigeons defecating in public if the pigeons don’t move out of the way. He thinks that the pigeons have broken that deal. Jerry is interested in Celia’s (Julia Pennington), his new girlfriend, collection of old toys, but she won’t let him touch them. Laney’s new coworker, “Sidler” Lou (Brent Hinkley), moves behind people without making a sound. He makes Laney spill coffee on her jacket, which leaves a mark that looks like Castro. Kramer takes the broken set pieces and uses them to make an exact copy of The Merv Griffin Show set in his apartment. He acts like the show is still airing and pretends to be the new host. When “guests” come on set, he even plays the show’s theme song and interviews everyone who comes into his apartment. Kramer even cuts off interviews to take a “commercial break” and eat chips and a Diet Coke before exclaiming, “Were back!” Laney plans to wear wrestling shoes to “out-Sidle the Sidler” who might be “sidling her out of a job.” When George turns to avoid a pigeon, he hits a squirrel instead. Jerry schemes for an opportunity to play with Celias toys. Jerry says on his “show” that he has finally found a way to play with the toys by giving Celia sleep aids by accident. Kramer is shocked by Jerry’s plan. Kramer makes Newman (Wayne Knight) a co-host on his “show” so he doesn’t have to do all the work himself. Miranda won’t let George put the squirrel to sleep until he pays for the surgery that will save it. Laney gives Tic Tacs to the Sidler to make him loud, but J doesn’t like the noise. Peterman (John O’Hurley), which makes him think of an old way of torturing people in Haiti. If he hears another rattle, Laney will be fired because he thinks it was her the whole time. Laney talks to the Sidler and suggests something else, like gum. The Sidler says he doesn’t like gum and only liked the Mickey Mouse gumball machine, which “they stopped making twenty years ago.” “Jerry and George feed Celia turkey (which contains Tryptophan) and red wine for dinner, then show her a boring home movie of George’s trip to Michigan as a child. She falls asleep quickly.” Jerry and George play with their toys like kids once she’s asleep. In the end, Laney joins in to play with an Easy-Bake Oven, even though Jerry says the batter is thirty years old. The show will now be called “Scandals and Animals” because Kramer is worried about his “ratings.” Kramer gets Jerry to admit that he’s been giving Celia drugs on the “show” (which still doesn’t have cameras) Then Kramer calls out an angry Celia from “backstage,” and she dumps Jerry while Kramer and Newman try to get the nonexistent audience to cheer. Kramer calls on an old friend and animal expert Jim Fowler for the Animals segment of the show. Fowler shows up with a hawk and asks Kramer, “Where are the cameras?” George brings the squirrel to the set to ask Fowler to take it off his hands, but the hawk goes after the squirrel and George (since he was holding the squirrel). Kramer says afterward, “It was a grind having to fill 10 hours a day.” The Merv Griffin set is destroyed in the process. Because Miranda told him to, bandaged George still has to take care of the squirrel and sleep on the couch. He then tells the pigeons to “laugh it up.” I just got into my car and heard something. “We have NO DEAL!”) At the end of the show, Laney and the Sidler knock Celia out again so she can play with her toys.

What’s that stuff in turkey that makes you sleepy…

FAQ

What episode of Seinfeld has Kramer as a turkey?

Is there a Thanksgiving Seinfeld episode?

Who played Celia on Seinfeld?

Who was the Sidler in Seinfeld?

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